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Five Years Gone
Date: Spring 2012 Characters: Jamie Madrox, Kirin Yi Summary:… 
2nd-Oct-2007 04:46 pm
Date: Spring 2012
Characters: Jamie Madrox, Kirin Yi
Summary: After playing guinea pig, Jamie heads home.
Warning(s): --
Status: Complete
Private

He couldn't make his hands stop shaking.

Resting his forehead against the door, he took a deep breath, trying one more time to fit the key in the lock and letting out a sigh of relief when he hit the mark, turning it and using his shoulder to force the sticking door open. Shutting it behind him and doing up the locks, he slid out of his jacket, moving to hang it up.

"Kirin?" he called, moving further into their small apartment.
Comments 
2nd-Oct-2007 09:27 pm (UTC)
"You're home late," Kirin answered, the statement carried signs of the anxiety that had taken hold while he waited. Even though Jamie was home, Kirin couldn't tear himself away from the window he had taken vigil.

"Was it work?"
2nd-Oct-2007 09:36 pm (UTC)
No. Doctor's appointment.

He bit back a slightly hysterical laugh, nodding silently and pulling a hooded sweatshirt off the couch, sliding it on and tucking his hands in the pockets, balling them into fists.

"I couldn't call. You know I would've."
2nd-Oct-2007 09:47 pm (UTC)
"I know. That's why..." Kirin trailed off and turned his gaze to the window, checking to see if there was anyone out there. There never was, but he still had to check.

"What happened? Are you okay?"
2nd-Oct-2007 09:50 pm (UTC)
He shook his head mutely, going over to the other man. Sliding his arms around a thin waist and resting his forehead on Kirin's shoulder. Not wanting to worry him, upset him, but needing the contact right now.
2nd-Oct-2007 09:59 pm (UTC)
Jamie's silence was answer enough, it was something bad. They rarely talked about anything that happened while they were apart, both knowing that the daily encounters and incidents were difficult enough to go through that it was unnecessary to have to relive them again.

Kirin leaned back into Jamie's embrace and stroked his hands along Jamie's arms. "I'm glad you're home."

It was all he could think of to say.
2nd-Oct-2007 10:06 pm (UTC)
He blew out a long breath, tightening his hold on the other man slightly. "Me too. Glad you're here."
2nd-Oct-2007 10:34 pm (UTC)
Kirin turned around in Jamie's arms and hugged the other man, forcing himself away from the window before he got swept up into another wave of unnecessary panic.

Jamie's here. I'm here. We're okay.

"We're okay." Kirin murmured, repeating the thought audibly, acting on the feeling that the other man needed to hear it as well.
2nd-Oct-2007 10:40 pm (UTC)
He stroked Kirin's hair absently, the repetitive motion meant to soothe them both.

"I think I'm going to be in trouble," he said unsteadily. "With Parkman. I don't know..." what they'll do.
2nd-Oct-2007 10:50 pm (UTC)
"What do you mean?" Kirin asked, the tension already increasing. "Trouble."

2nd-Oct-2007 11:09 pm (UTC)
Jamie moved away slightly, hearing the thread of fear in the other man's tone.

"I told them that I wasn't going to cooperate today, that I wasn't going to do it willingly." He pressed his hands over his eyes, still shaking. "He said he was going to tell Parkman."
2nd-Oct-2007 11:36 pm (UTC)
"Cooperate with what?" Kirin asked quietly, his voice trembling, "They'll force you. You know that. They wouldn't do anything to you, you're too valuable. They might lock me up again. They have enough reasons to..."

Kirin swayed on his feet, the thought making it difficult to breath, "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to say it."

We both know it's true.
2nd-Oct-2007 11:40 pm (UTC)
"I'm sorry," Jamie choked, the fear that what he'd done would be taken out on Kirin rising up to strangle him.

"They won't--they can't do that, you didn't do anything. It was my fault."
2nd-Oct-2007 11:52 pm (UTC)
"It doesn't matter whose fault it is, they only care with what they want." Kirin shook his head and brought his hands to his face. "They shouldn't, but it hasn't stopped them before."
2nd-Oct-2007 11:59 pm (UTC)
"I'm sorry," Jamie whispered, moving to sit down. Feeling sick with guilt and fear. "I'm sorry. I couldn't let them, Kirin. I couldn't..."
3rd-Oct-2007 02:18 am (UTC)
Kirin let out an uneven breath, and raked a hand along the sleeve covering his arm. "You did what you had to, what was right. Don't be sorry for that."

He began to pace the room, his movements growing more agitated with each passing moment. "Maybe, maybe it isn't bad. Or not that bad, you know? It can be fixed. Right?"

3rd-Oct-2007 02:24 am (UTC)
Jamie nodded quickly, seizing onto that, fingers digging into the couch.

"I'll fix it. I'll talk to him, I won't make a problem about it. I promise. I'll fix it."
3rd-Oct-2007 02:33 am (UTC)
"Do you want to?" Kirin turned suddenly and fixed his gaze on Jamie. "What if they ask you to do it again?"

I don't even know what it is.
3rd-Oct-2007 02:36 am (UTC)
I don't think they'll ask.

"I'll deal with it. We all have to do things we don't want to." The words sounded dull, even to his own ears. But he didn't have a choice.
3rd-Oct-2007 02:43 am (UTC)
Kirin walked over and wrapped his arms around Jamie's shoulders, "I wish I could make it all go away. Change things. You shouldn't have to deal with it."

It wasn't fair, but life was never fair.
3rd-Oct-2007 02:48 am (UTC)
Jamie pulled the other man down beside him, pressing a kiss to his jaw, hiding his face against his neck.

"I know. I know. But you can't and I can't. We have to deal with it."
3rd-Oct-2007 02:54 am (UTC)
"I know, if we don't it'll be the end." Kirin whispered and shivered at voicing the thought. "I don't want it to end, not like that. As long as I have you, I can do this. I will do it."
3rd-Oct-2007 03:01 am (UTC)
As long as I have you, I can do this. I will do it. The words echoed in his mind.

"I'll be more careful," he murmured. "I won't let anything happen to you, okay?"
3rd-Oct-2007 03:13 am (UTC)
"I don't want anything to happen to you." Kirin held on to Jamie tighter. "I love you. I'd hurt anyone who'd hurt you, anyone."
3rd-Oct-2007 03:18 am (UTC)
"I'm fine," Jamie told him softly, the words not tasting so much a lie when he said them like this. He could be fine here, with Kirin, holding him.

"I'm not hurt."
3rd-Oct-2007 03:24 am (UTC)
"You don't sound fine," Kirin whispered and stroked his fingertips through Jamie's short hair. "They say that in time it gets better. Better comes and goes."
3rd-Oct-2007 03:30 am (UTC)
"I guess all we have to do is wait, then," Jamie murmured, the soothing motion of Kirin's hands comforting him.

He pulled back, kissing the other man softly. "Come lay down with me awhile. Want to be close to you and the damn couch isn't letting me."
3rd-Oct-2007 04:00 am (UTC)
Kirin nodded faintly and pressed a kiss to the man's lips before he stood from the couch and walked toward their bedroom, absently pulling his long hair back into a ponytail.
3rd-Oct-2007 04:09 am (UTC)
He kicked off his shoes as he entered their bedroom, not bothering to get undressed any further, just climbing into bed and curling up slightly on his side.

The slight sink in the mattress, the worn pillows, the scent of Kirin's shampoo on the sheets, all served to relax him just that little bit more, the incident today fading in his mind. He loved his home for that.
3rd-Oct-2007 04:29 am (UTC)
Kirin laid on the bed next to Jamie, curling up on his side as he wrapped Jamie's arms around his waist. His thoughts wouldn't settle enough for him to sleep, but Jamie's presence as he laid there was enough to get him to relax. He could already feel his pulse slowing to a steady and comfortable beat, a welcome change from the amped feeling he carried with him most of the day.

3rd-Oct-2007 04:35 am (UTC)
Jamie reached down and tangled their fingers together, pressing a kiss behind Kirin's ear.

"I missed you today," he murmured, eyes closing. Not sleeping, just...resting them. "Hate being away from you anymore."
3rd-Oct-2007 04:43 am (UTC)
"I hate being away from you, always worry that something will happen and I can't do anything to help you." Kirin clutched Jamie's hand, willfully reminding himself not to hold so tight that it hurt. "I hate that. I miss you every time we leave in the morning."
3rd-Oct-2007 04:46 am (UTC)
His heart lurched in his chest.

"Shh," he murmured, tightening his arms around Kirin. "You shouldn't worry so much. I'm not going to let anything happen to me. Not going to let anything keep me from coming home to you."

It wasn't really a promise he could keep, but he'd certainly try his damnedest to.
3rd-Oct-2007 04:55 am (UTC)
"I'm trying not to worry so much, I know you'll come home, sometimes I can't help it," Kirin closed his eyes. "I wish they'd let me go with you, I know better. Better chance we'll both make it home if we're not together, that's why."
3rd-Oct-2007 04:59 am (UTC)
"So they say," Jamie muttered, pressing his face into Kirin's hair, speaking against his ear. "No one would take better care of you then me."

There was something fiercely possessive in the words, the feeling tight in his chest. Kirin was his. And Jamie had never liked to share, regardless the circumstance.
4th-Oct-2007 08:57 pm (UTC)
It isn't you they worry about.

"No one else can," he whispered, a faint smile appeared in spite of Kirin's dark thoughts in response to the intense possessive tone in Jamie's voice. "I'm yours, always will be."

Even when the world forced them to be apart, that still had not changed.
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